Matchstick Men Xpert League, Xpert League Manager: TonyBrazil

Gollum bests gorillas

66 minutes of ugliness have culminated in this penalty kick. Matchstick Men goalie Frodo ‘Gollum’ Bagger is ready for it; he strides the length of the pitch and slams the ball into the net. Finally the Matchsticks go into the lead as Gollum bests the gorillas. “One United were a disgrace to the beautiful game,” admires manager Tony Brazil, “they were negative and tooled up for a fight. They rarely left their own half even when in possession of the ball, happy with a point and ready to maim anyone who got too close.   “We’ve played that way ourselves on occasion, but normally lost. So when Gollum scored from the spot I expected more goals to come – but not from United equalising four minutes later with their first goal attempt of the game.   “The gorillas pulled back then into a tight defensive huddle, and we unleashed our own beast of the jungle – Gollum pushed up from his goalmouth to join in the fray for the last ten minutes.   “This Matchstick madness bore fruit during a corner, the ball ricocheting around the twenty two men in the box until it flickered into the net. We held onto the 2-1 lead till the end to take a huge win away at One United.”   Brazil gets back into his cage and gnaws on a roughly chopped selection of root vegetables, “after my behaviour at the last two meetings between these clubs the restraining order says I must be locked-up before and after the final whistle of any future matches.   “But you know what? I kind of like this constriction.”   Brazil eats shoots and leaves.

2014-10-09 10:40 545 Views Reporter: TheAPERSON

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