UU Accies Board of Directors (wife) has instructed KElliott not to bother with a review of the teams he will face in Division 6:31 this season. It's already been done very well by Asher.
Given the difficulties (relegation) that KElliott expressed (moaned and swore like f*%!) the Board felt that the manager's time (cash) would be better spent researching (shopping) the global market (E-bay, Amazon, City Centre) reviewing the availability (carrying wallet) and researching the available talent (shelling out for) to improve the squad.
The Board have instructed KElliott to strengthen (spend more) in certain areas of the squad, to whit:
1 x Goalkeeper (shoes)
1 x Defender (wall paper)
1/2 x Midfielder (coat) or two if we can stretch the budget
1 x Forward (another i-pad)
The Board further instructed KElliott to focus on youth, where possible, but under 25's for definite, whereby KElliott drew the line, stating: "more energy does not equal better quality," or words to that effect.
As a result the Board has stopped talking to KElliott whose jacket is now on a shoogly peg.
Our reporter managed to catch a brief word with KElliott as he raced to his car on leaving the Sink, with face like thunder. When asked about his relationship with the board and if they are backing him after last season's dismal failure, he replied:
"Sometimes this management malarky is really hard work. but it's ma f*%!&in team, and I'll do what I like. If she, I mean they, don't like it they they can stuff it up their erchies!"
Happy days at the Sink then!