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Top of the Iggy Pops |
“The Stooges’ keeper/captain got booked, then our keeper stepped up to score a penalty; the opening fifteen minutes were amazing and it just got better,” manager Tony Brazil bar-chords his way through a version of ‘Now I Wanna Be Your Dog’ then takes off his guitar and places it against a huge Marshall amp. This results in a howling feedback throughout the rest of the press conference.
“I’ve always loved The Stooges, both musically and as a footballing side. However what turned up at our Estadio Lucifer was more of a tribute act, and we discovered that the driving force – the Iggy Pop if you like – had moved on to manage another team elsewhere. Their new manager hadn’t got to grips with the talent at his disposal, but whilst I added to his confusion by plying him with drink, confectionery and psychedelic music there was no guilt in my heart. When we over ran them today for a handsome victory I saw it as karma.
“Last season my title rivals slaughtered a managerless team midseason whilst I faced that same team under two different but equally good managers either end of the season. In no small thanks to those circumstances the Matchstick Men finished third. Today, with the tables turned, we are top of the table at the turn of the season.
“To paraphrase Iggy Pop, ‘we got a right’ to be top of the tree but in truth it’s only through goal difference. The top five teams are only separated by one point. Tough divison huh?”
As the assembled press hacks nod Brazil straps back on his guitar, “we love it tough. Hit it boys.”
The band strikes up and Tony Brazil entertains the exiting press people with the Stooges’ song ‘Gimme Danger.’
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